


What It Is To Be Cared For

by lotsofquestionslimitedanswers



Series: To Be Better To You [3]
Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Needs a Hug, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Sickfic, Soft Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Soft Jaskier | Dandelion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:39:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22567951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lotsofquestionslimitedanswers/pseuds/lotsofquestionslimitedanswers
Summary: While Geralt takes care of a sick Jaskier, Jaskier asks Geralt about which creature Geralt finds most terrifying. Geralt feels conflicted over his answer when he considers all the kindness Jaskier shows him.Or: Geralt takes care of a sick Jaskier and Jaskier takes care of Geralt's heart.Excerpt:Geralt doesn’t mean to, but he considers the answer to Jaskier’s question. Is that really the creature Geralt finds most terrifying? Is it the very creature he is often hired to protect?“I think it might be humans.” Geralt whispers to himself. “They do horrible things to each other just because they can.”“Many humans have been awful to you too.” Jaskier mumbles.Geralt startles and bolts upright. He looks over to see Jaskier looking up at him. Jaskier’s propped up on his right arm and he rubs at his eyes with his left hand. The action tugs at Geralt’s heart a bit and Geralt is not quite sure why.“I didn’t mean for you to hear that.” Geralt says.“I assumed so.” Jaskier sits up and scoots closer to Geralt. “But…since I did hear you say it, uh…would you like to talk about it?”
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: To Be Better To You [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1616074
Comments: 33
Kudos: 476





	What It Is To Be Cared For

**Geralt**

“Geralt?” Jaskier asks. His voice is more of a croak than a voice.

They have stopped for the night. Jaskier is sick. Geralt is worried. His friend has been cold and feverish all day. The next town is still half a day’s journey away. It all started with a sore throat Jaskier neglected to mention, then there was a cough, followed by a runny nose, then Jaskier started running a fever. Geralt only realized Jaskier was sick when Jaskier tripped and crashed into Geralt. Then Geralt could feel his friend burning up. After questioning his friend, Geralt found out that Jaskier has been experiencing symptoms for two days and was planning to wait to mention said symptoms until they reached a town. Stupid bard. Now, Jaskier seems to feel constantly too cold or too hot and is constantly coughing.

“Yes?” Geralt asks, turning to face the bard.

The two are sleeping next to each other on separate sleep pads that are as close to the fire as can be safe.

“Always wanted to know…what is the most terrifying creature you have ever faced?” Jaskier asks.

Immediately images of humans jeering at Geralt, throwing food at Jaskier, attacking Jaskier, and refusing to allow Geralt inside taverns flash through Geralt’s mind. That is how humans treat outsiders. Humans also murder each other, steal precious items from one another, hurt their loved ones, and commit so many other atrocities against each other.

Geralt does not feel like delving into the answer to this question with Jaskier at the moment, so Geralt lies on his back and gazes up at the bright moon as he asks, “Why does it matter?”

Jaskier yawns. “Just curious…you must’ve faced lots.”

Jaskier is quiet after that.

Geralt assumes Jaskier is asleep. Jaskier is exhausted. He was dead on his feet several hours ago, so Geralt let Jaskier ride Roach with him. Jaskier nearly fell off three times because he kept falling asleep.

Geralt doesn’t mean to, but he considers the answer to Jaskier’s question. Is that really the creature Geralt finds most terrifying? Is it the very creature he is often hired to protect?

“I think it might be humans.” Geralt whispers to himself. “They do horrible things to each other just because they can.”

“Makes sense. Many humans have been awful to you too.” Jaskier mumbles.

Geralt startles and bolts upright. He looks over to see Jaskier looking up at him. Jaskier’s propped up on his right arm and he rubs at his eyes with his left hand. The action tugs at Geralt’s heart a bit and Geralt is not quite sure why.

“I didn’t mean for you to hear that.” Geralt says.

“I assumed so.” Jaskier sits up and scoots closer to Geralt. “But…since I _did_ hear you say it, uh…would you like to talk about it?”

“No.”

Jaskier nods. For once, Jaskier’s quiet. Then Jaskier says, “For what it’s worth, you do not deserve the cruel treatment that comes your way.”

Geralt looks away from Jaskier and cannot come up with anything to say.

The wind blows and Jaskier shivers. “It’s getting colder out here.” Jaskier observes. He scoots closer to Geralt and Geralt can only watch as Jaskier shares his blanket with Geralt, spreading it out over both of their laps.

The gesture makes Geralt feel warm on the inside. Jaskier clearly cares for Geralt. At first, Geralt assumed Jaskier only wanted to travel with Geralt so Jaskier could become famous by writing songs about the life of Geralt of Rivia. As time went on, Jaskier did gain some level of fame…one does not get invited to perform at the wedding feast of Princess Pavetta of Cintra without at least mild fame. Even after gaining his fame, Jaskier stayed with Geralt. With the exceptions of times when Jaskier ran off with new muses, Jaskier always stayed with Geralt. Even when they have been separated for a period of time, Jaskier has always been happy to see Geralt and go on a new adventure with Geralt whenever they meet again. Geralt has never known what to make of the bard for just this reason.

Geralt looks at Jaskier. The bard is struggling to keep his eyes open.

“You should get some sleep.” Geralt says.

Jaskier blinks. “I feel bad…leaving you alone with…such unpleasant thoughts.” Jaskier mumbles. “Stupid question…sorry.”

Geralt grabs his own abandoned blanket and wraps it around Jaskier’s shoulders. “Get some sleep, my friend.”

“What about…you?” Jaskier coughs and then presses his face against Geralt’s shoulder.

“I’ll wake you in a few hours. We’ll find a tavern so you can ride out this illness.” Geralt replies.

“Just a cold. I can…I can keep going.” Jaskier shivers.

“But we do not have to. We will stop so you can rest.”

Jaskier pulls away from Geralt and stares at him with a sorrowful expression. He opens his mouth once and then shakes his head. He rests his head on Geralt’s shoulder again.

“What?” Geralt asks.

“If people would just…pay attention,” Jaskier coughs a bit. “They would see that…that you _do_ feel…a lot…you care a lot.” Jaskier hugs Geralt’s arm.

“You are just excited about the tavern.” Geralt teases, trying to lighten the mood even though he feels uneasy.

Geralt always feels strange when Jaskier does things like this. Jaskier likes to be held or at least hold on to someone when he feels vulnerable. This is his pattern regardless of whether Jaskier is feeling sick, sad, drunk, scared, anxious; any vulnerability leads to touching from Jaskier. Geralt does not understand why Jaskier trusts him so much to admit his vulnerability. Perhaps Jaskier does not know that he does it.

“No.” Jaskier shakes his head almost frantically. “You care about people” Jaskier coughs again. “You help. _All_ of the time.”

Just so Jaskier will feel less distressed, Geralt tells the truth. “Fine. I do care. Please get some rest.” Geralt says.

“See?” Jaskier has the nerve to cuddle closer to Geralt’s side and says, “You care.”

Geralt is not sure how Jaskier is going to be able to sleep if he is bent sideways like this, so he says, “Move for a second.”

Jaskier does as he is told.

Geralt lies down on his sleeping pad and says, “You’ll sleep better lying down. And you’ll have more warmth if you keep my blanket and we continue to share yours.”

Jaskier lies beside Geralt. If Geralt fixes the blankets so they only cover Jaskier because he is worried about Jaskier right now, Jaskier does not need to know. That is Geralt’s business.

As if reading his mind, Jaskier pulls some of the blankets over Geralt and hugs Geralt’s arm again, burying his face in Geralt’s shoulder. As annoying as he can be at times, Jaskier is worth more riches than Geralt will ever see in his life.

“You are so easy to care for.” Geralt whispers without meaning to.

“As a chatty pet?” Jaskier asks.

“No. Pets are taken care of by their owners. It is not often the other way around.”

“Not following,”

Geralt thinks back to all the small kindnesses Jaskier grants him. Jaskier rubs oils on Geralt’s sore body. He patches up wounds and stitches areas Geralt cannot reach. He listens when Geralt wants to talk. Jaskier picks monster guts out of Geralt’s hair. He reminds Geralt to eat. He reminds Geralt to sleep. Jaskier nearly always looks happy to see Geralt no matter how much time has passed since they last saw each other. He actually asks how Geralt is doing and thinks about how Geralt feels. Jaskier has gotten into fights with people who sneer at Geralt and say Geralt is an unfeeling witcher…who call Geralt a monster…who act like no one could ever care about Geralt. Jaskier has made it clear that he cares about Geralt.

“You took care of me first.” Geralt whispers. “You care about me…not just out of self-interest. You truly care.”

Jaskier hugs Geralt’s arm a little tighter and nuzzles Geralt’s shoulder. “Of course, I care about you.”

If Geralt feels warmth spread up out in his chest as well as a burning sensation in his eyes because of the bard’s words, that is his business. If Geralt uses his free hand to pull his friend a little closer to him because of the bard’s words and not because Geralt is worried about Jaskier’s cold, that is also Geralt’s business. The small sigh that comes from Jaskier as he snuggles closer to Geralt’s arm is Jaskier’s business.

“Hey Geralt?” Jaskier whispers.

“Hmm?” Geralt replies. He looks down at Jaskier.

Jaskier looks up at Geralt and whispers, “You are also easy to care for.”

Geralt has to look away from Jaskier. Geralt’s heart aches over Jaskier’s words. Geralt’s eyes sting as they fill with tears Geralt hastily tries to blink back. Geralt is at a loss for words. Geralt does not understand how the bard can consider him easy to care for. Witchers are not supposed to be cared for. Geralt should not be cared for. Yet, here they are. Hot tears blur Geralt’s vision and spill down Geralt’s face. He cannot move either of his arms or Jaskier might think something is wrong, so Geralt just lets the tears flow freely in the hopes that this will remain unnoticed.

A shaky but gentle thumb rubs away the tears. “It’s okay,” Jaskier whispers. “It’s okay if you need to cry.”

Geralt is supposed to be taking care of Jaskier, not the other way around. Geralt tries to tell Jaskier this, but to Geralt’s horror, all that comes out is a small sob.

Jaskier wiggles out of Geralt’s grasp except for a hand on Geralt’s shoulder. Geralt uses his now free hands to cover his face to try to stop himself from breaking down completely.

Jaskier moves the blankets again so they cover the two of them from head to toe. Then Geralt feels Jaskier pull Geralt’s head to his shoulder. Geralt is too afraid to move. What if he is no longer easy to care for if he cries right now?

“I covered us up. It is just us in here; you are safe to cry all you need. Only we will know. I’m going to hug you now.” Jaskier says in a soft voice.

Geralt feels Jaskier’s arms wrap around him and something in Geralt breaks. Geralt hugs Jaskier back and heaves great hiccupping sobs into Jaskier’s shoulder. He does not deserve such kindness, but Jaskier offers it anyway…like he always does.

_Jaskier_

Jaskier just wanted to let Geralt know that the witcher is easy to care for. Geralt is _so easy_ to care for. Whoever told Geralt he does not deserve to be cared for should die a horrific death as far as Jaskier’s concerned. Odds are, Geralt did not come to the conclusion that he does not deserve to be taken care of and cared for on his own.

Now, Geralt is sobbing into Jaskier’s shoulder. Jaskier’s heart breaks for Geralt and he struggles not to cry as well.

“You deserve to be cared for.” Jaskier tells Geralt. He has to raise his voice a bit in the hopes that Geralt will hear him over his sobs. It hurts Jaskier’s throat to speak this loudly, but it will be worth it if he can get through to Geralt. “You are so _good,_ and kind and you spend all your time helping other people.” Jaskier tells Geralt. “You deserve to have someone care for you and hold you when you cry. You deserve to get to cry if the urge strikes.” Jaskier keeps on hand pressed firmly against Geralt’s back and starts to stroke Geralt’s hair with his other hand. “Crying does not make you any less easy to care for.” Jaskier tells Geralt.

This just makes Geralt cry harder.

Jaskier’s eyes fill with tears. Jaskier guessed correctly; Geralt must have been worried that crying right now will make Jaskier stop thinking Geralt is easy to care for.

“For the record, even if you were not easy to care for, you would still deserve to be cared for Geralt. You are not a monster. Anyone who pays attention to you for five minutes can see that you are not a monster. Those cruel people who sling hate at you are cowards who are intimidated by your appearance and your skillset. They insist that you do not have emotions, so they can feel justified in their fear of you. From what I have seen of it, you have such a lovely heart, Geralt. You care so much. It is so obvious that you care. They just choose not to see it. That is not your fault, Geralt. Their hate does not make you undeserving of the care of others.” Jaskier says as tears roll down his face. They are tears of empathy for his friend who has been so hurt by humankind. They are tears of anger for the awful people who have been so cruel to Geralt for _so long_.

Eventually, Geralt calms down. He pulls away from Jaskier, hastily rubbing at his eyes, hunched over a little, clearly embarrassed of his tears.

Rather than try to make Geralt talk about it now, Jaskier says, “Perhaps we should get some rest. Today has been taxing.”

Jaskier should never have asked Geralt about the worst monsters. He should have assumed it would be humans who are the cruelest. Yet, if he had not asked, they may not have ever spoken as they have now.

Geralt rearranges the blankets so they mostly just cover Jaskier again. Then Geralt lies down beside Jaskier and pulls Jaskier close. Jaskier snuggles up to Geralt’s chest, basking in the warmth of his friend.

“Don’t want you to freeze to death.” Geralt mumbles, resting his chin on Jaskier’s head.

Jaskier knows better than to tease Geralt right now. Instead, Jaskier smiles and closes his eyes, burrowing his face further into Geralt’s chest.

**Geralt**

Geralt can feel Jaskier snuggle closer to Geralt. Geralt feels warm and safe here with his friend. Jaskier falls asleep almost immediately. Geralt hears Jaskier snore softly into his chest. He can feel the bard’s heartbeat. Geralt nuzzles his face into Jaskier’s hair and falls asleep feeling warm and cared for.


End file.
